I pulled out a lot of hair today. I haven’t washed it in a while because I hate getting it wet. It makes me feel terrible about myself. I still have piles of hair on the bathroom counter, but if I go in there I know I’ll start pulling again. I think this blog may be helping me. It’s keeping my hands busy typing rather than pulling. I like how fast I am at typing, it gives me some sort of satisfaction. Maybe it’s similar to hair pulling, it’s not as relaxing though.
Anyway, I feel kind of useless with this blog. Nobody really seems to be benefitting but me, and it seems like a waste of time. But maybe it could help my trich.
I don’t know. I gave myself another bald spot. When I went to see my mom she started to cry because of how thin my hair has gotten. She has never done that before. It must be really bad this time.
I still try to keep my therapist in the loop, but it’s hard when my hands are always busy. Everything is hard to do with my hands always busy.